Everything I read here is pretty much accurate. My sister splits, rages, is abusive, lies and manipulates in ways that never cease to shock and amaze us, will tell any lie in an attempt to destroy every relationship I have, and of course, it's all my fault.
Every little slight is WWIII, and half of those she makes up in her twisted little mind.
Thank god my wife and I live in a different state than she does because she lives (no exaggeration) for slandering me to anyone who will listen. I can't say how many family friends, acquaintances, and even relatives have accosted me to let me know how terrible they think I've been, when it's just my sister, again, lying up a storm and twisting everything to make her look like the victim when the fact is, she's simply exulting in destroying various relationships in my life. She's destroyed quite a few. This is particularly difficult because every so often with a family friend or relative I'll have to put out a fire she started (which by the way happens nearly every time I have to deal with her), but I can't use water because there's no way the people she's lied to can believe her lies could be that big. It's not that one thing is a demonstrable lie, it's that everything is a distorted half-lie and the final result is a nice character assassination. The times that I've tried to defend or explain myself, the truth that she could be lying so outrageously is in itself so outrageous that I wind up looking like an asshole. Try defending yourself by saying that someone else (who looks perfectly collected to them) is a mentally deranged lying psycho - you look crazier than they do! It's nearly impossible to navigate, and the result is many relationships in ruins. She lives in Oppositeland: every single thing she blames on us is what she's flagrantly, obviously, guilty of. It's absolutely impressive. Her hypocrisy is second to none. The way she behaved when my father died six months ago set a new record. It was her dream come true, the chance to stick and twist her cunning blades into everyone she despises the most - her family - while they were prostrate with grief. She was in heaven! Things she said and did felt actually slimy, like there was actual slime on our skin and we needed to wash it off; the relentless narcissism with the lies and sadism were I have to say fucking mind-blowing, not to mention painful and traumatic. I have waking nightmares of her leaning over my father's newly-expired body with a demon-face, like the face of the little girl in the Exorcist. There is no way to describe her tone of voice and the expressions on her face more accurately that to say, evil like a demon. Wicked is as wicked does. I'm going to support groups and therapists to try and work this shit through, but the sad part is, because of my little nephew (and God help him!), we will always have to deal with her. Every time we have to have a She stopped drinking six months ago - she's 47 - and it got worse, because she stopped self-medicating. For 25 years I thought I was an asshole but it was just her and my gullible self letting my head be filled with her lies. Don't believe their lies. My sister is a cunning, sadistic, lying bitch and if I could I would X her out of my life in a heartbeat, but she has a four year old angel of a son, so I can't. That doesn't mean she's above using him as a pawn and a weapon to wreak revenge and punishment on the rest of her family. She doesn't give a shit if it hurts the boy to be be alienated from the only family he has: her need to punish us outweighs any concern she could possibly have for him. It astonishes us to this moment; and we look forward to another few decades of this malevolent being wreaking destruction all around any chance she gets, and creating a few opportunities of her own out of thin air, to boot.
I love my sister, but I wish to hell I never had to see her again. In a world of bad choices, the Medium Chill is the best way I've found of dealing with her. She doesn't like but this way we get some relief from her cravings for chaos. It's sad.
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